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jenny_wildcat...But get the hell out of Provo already. Life does not start at the Chuck-a-Rama and end when darling Johnny Beck is a sixth string NFL quarterback (I can't be entirely sure, but wasn't Steve Young ready to retire at Beck's age?)
My dear friendshellic has posted some interesting news. Her cousin that is three years younger has announced her engagement. Also, her grandmother is on the "Why aren't you married?" spin toward shellic, which has sparked some discussion in her comments of if she is an old maid at the insane age of.... 21, which is OLD when you're talking Utah college girl IN GENERAL (I emphasize those last two words).
(My reaction: Holy crap, people, she's just become legal to gamble and you expect she should be saddled with three snotwipe children and a holier-than-thou RM husband by now?)
Okay, okay, maybe I'm a little sensitive to this subject because I consider myself a "Good Little Mormon Girl" (though I guess that status is debatable in Happy Valley), yet I have been on six or seven dates IN MY ENTIRE LIFE (depends on which ones actually count, which varies from person to person). The thing is that I have no desire for dating at this point in my life and I am thisclose to graduating from college. The funny thing is: none of the Twelve Apostles -- not so much as my bishopric -- have showed up at my doorstep demanding that I hand over my temple recommend. Oh, there have been buttmunch RMs whose mission presidents threatened to sic the dog on them if they weren't engaged two weeks after they get home, but they're idiots (not to mention they are few and far between, but for some stupid reason, they're the ones that movies like "Singles Ward" and "The RM" are made about).
My point is that this asinine idea that all Utah Mormon girls want to get married out of high school and that the guys all pick up the dumb younger girls right off their missions is as much bullshit as the idea that we still practice polygamy. Granted, it's not like some of our number are helping our image ("Singles Ward" much?), but if we're ever to be taken seriously, we have GOT to quit acting like we just came off the plains when we realize that we've actually spent some time out of Young Women and still are not married.
Now you're all "Well, aren't we supposed to be a "peculiar people?" Let me tell you something: the "peculiar" that BYU grads are talking about doesn't win friends, let alone converts (I do pick on BYU alums a lot, but that's because it's so easy). I think the "peculiar" we want is the kind that means we genuinely care about the people that the rest of the world doesn't give a flying rat turd about. You look at the world and, if you keep your core values, it's easy to be "peculiar" without being downright retarded (the truth hurts).
This is not to say I am against being married. I fully intend to get married, but I want to wait until the time is right. I am not mature enough to handle having a family at this point in my life. Contrary to what some may think, there are some advantages to waiting until after officially getting out of puberty. I have plenty of time to be married and have a family and I look forward to it, but I can wait.
Last word: if anyone out there (especially if you're Mormon) is obsessed with not being married, I recommend a talk by John Bytheway (I can hear some of you say: "Finally! A BYU grad who she approves of!" XP) called "What I'd Wish I'd Known When I Was Single." It gives some great advice of what to enjoy about being single and how to get "people with an underdeveloped sense of appropriateness" (which is what Bytheway calls people like shellic's grandmother) off your back while you're waiting to be ready for marriage. (shellic, before you ask, yes you can borrow it ^_^) Live life and let the big things come as they may.
Apologies for being preachy, but now that I've exhausted my soapbox, I have a "24" season five box set that's calling my name. And Tony (my cat) is trying to attack my laptop. I think someone's taking the term "mouse" a little too literal.
Love from,
Jenny Wildcat
My dear friend
shellic has posted some interesting news. Her cousin that is three years younger has announced her engagement. Also, her grandmother is on the "Why aren't you married?" spin toward shellic, which has sparked some discussion in her comments of if she is an old maid at the insane age of.... 21, which is OLD when you're talking Utah college girl IN GENERAL (I emphasize those last two words).(My reaction: Holy crap, people, she's just become legal to gamble and you expect she should be saddled with three snotwipe children and a holier-than-thou RM husband by now?)
Okay, okay, maybe I'm a little sensitive to this subject because I consider myself a "Good Little Mormon Girl" (though I guess that status is debatable in Happy Valley), yet I have been on six or seven dates IN MY ENTIRE LIFE (depends on which ones actually count, which varies from person to person). The thing is that I have no desire for dating at this point in my life and I am thisclose to graduating from college. The funny thing is: none of the Twelve Apostles -- not so much as my bishopric -- have showed up at my doorstep demanding that I hand over my temple recommend. Oh, there have been buttmunch RMs whose mission presidents threatened to sic the dog on them if they weren't engaged two weeks after they get home, but they're idiots (not to mention they are few and far between, but for some stupid reason, they're the ones that movies like "Singles Ward" and "The RM" are made about).
My point is that this asinine idea that all Utah Mormon girls want to get married out of high school and that the guys all pick up the dumb younger girls right off their missions is as much bullshit as the idea that we still practice polygamy. Granted, it's not like some of our number are helping our image ("Singles Ward" much?), but if we're ever to be taken seriously, we have GOT to quit acting like we just came off the plains when we realize that we've actually spent some time out of Young Women and still are not married.
Now you're all "Well, aren't we supposed to be a "peculiar people?" Let me tell you something: the "peculiar" that BYU grads are talking about doesn't win friends, let alone converts (I do pick on BYU alums a lot, but that's because it's so easy). I think the "peculiar" we want is the kind that means we genuinely care about the people that the rest of the world doesn't give a flying rat turd about. You look at the world and, if you keep your core values, it's easy to be "peculiar" without being downright retarded (the truth hurts).
Back to marriage, some of the best points are made with a story. We learn best from other people's screw-ups, after all. I had a roommate (I will call her "Sally," because her situation is embarassing enough without scores of people online reading about it and knowing it's her). Sally was form Provo and a freshman straight out of high school and her number one priority was to GET MARRIED. She was majoring in music, which was just a nice way of saying she was after her MRS degree (apologies to real music majors who actually want to do something with their studies). Not a week went by that she bemoaned the fact that she was not dating anyone. Sally hated having me a roommate because I would tell people point-blank that I was not interested in dating at that point and she thought that was scaring the nice boys away. At the end of the spring semester, she ended up dating someone, but he broke it off two weeks before the end of the year. This pretty much devastated Sally, because she had almost finished her freshman year and -- GASP -- she was not engaged. Well, she couldn't go back to Provo with no rock on her finger, so she found the first loser she possibly could for a rebound (whom I'll call Bob because I know another prick named Bob and the similarities are uncanny. Apparently, he was as deseperate as she was, so they went down to Wal-Mart, opened a Cracker Jack box and he proposed to her the last day of Finals week. Sally had saved face.
The story does not end there: their families hate each other. Sally's family disapproved of her rushing into it, but Bob's family was all for it (Bob's dad is a marriage professor at the college we went to, so must know everything *sarcasmsarcasmsarcam*). Sally and Bob were married in August and moved into the on-campus married housing, which they still live in three-plus years later. They had a baby, whom Bob insisted on naming some stupid name that he picked up on his mission (which, it might sound nice in whatever rat-hole he served in, but it sounds pretty idiotic in America). Sally is not allowed to be home alone and is required by Bob to go to his parents' house. Sally can't go visit her friends (who have moved on since spending two years at the junior college) unless Bob goes with, but he won't do it. And don't even ask about visiting her family. She is pretty much under Bob's thumb day and night. He can't hold down a decent job and won't continue his education so he can find something better, so Sally, with her Associate's, has to keep taking classes at the junior college so they can have free rent on campus. Plus, Sally has to take care of the baby and work because Bob sure as hell won't do it (he is the husband, after all. Though, I would venture that some experienced husbands would want to kick his teeth in. I can't say for 100% sure, but I'd be willing to take that bet to Wendover). All this misery for Sally because she couldn't wait a few years to get married.
The story does not end there: their families hate each other. Sally's family disapproved of her rushing into it, but Bob's family was all for it (Bob's dad is a marriage professor at the college we went to, so must know everything *sarcasmsarcasmsarcam*). Sally and Bob were married in August and moved into the on-campus married housing, which they still live in three-plus years later. They had a baby, whom Bob insisted on naming some stupid name that he picked up on his mission (which, it might sound nice in whatever rat-hole he served in, but it sounds pretty idiotic in America). Sally is not allowed to be home alone and is required by Bob to go to his parents' house. Sally can't go visit her friends (who have moved on since spending two years at the junior college) unless Bob goes with, but he won't do it. And don't even ask about visiting her family. She is pretty much under Bob's thumb day and night. He can't hold down a decent job and won't continue his education so he can find something better, so Sally, with her Associate's, has to keep taking classes at the junior college so they can have free rent on campus. Plus, Sally has to take care of the baby and work because Bob sure as hell won't do it (he is the husband, after all. Though, I would venture that some experienced husbands would want to kick his teeth in. I can't say for 100% sure, but I'd be willing to take that bet to Wendover). All this misery for Sally because she couldn't wait a few years to get married.
This is not to say I am against being married. I fully intend to get married, but I want to wait until the time is right. I am not mature enough to handle having a family at this point in my life. Contrary to what some may think, there are some advantages to waiting until after officially getting out of puberty. I have plenty of time to be married and have a family and I look forward to it, but I can wait.
Last word: if anyone out there (especially if you're Mormon) is obsessed with not being married, I recommend a talk by John Bytheway (I can hear some of you say: "Finally! A BYU grad who she approves of!" XP) called "What I'd Wish I'd Known When I Was Single." It gives some great advice of what to enjoy about being single and how to get "people with an underdeveloped sense of appropriateness" (which is what Bytheway calls people like shellic's grandmother) off your back while you're waiting to be ready for marriage. (shellic, before you ask, yes you can borrow it ^_^) Live life and let the big things come as they may.
Apologies for being preachy, but now that I've exhausted my soapbox, I have a "24" season five box set that's calling my name. And Tony (my cat) is trying to attack my laptop. I think someone's taking the term "mouse" a little too literal.
Love from,
Jenny Wildcat
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Date: 2007-01-04 02:57 am (UTC)Anyhow, my curiosity is now satisfied. And AMEN SISTA! And before you lend me that talk I need to mention took The Give with me on Christmas break because I wasn’t able to finish it before finals. I really didn’t have any free time till the minute I left, so I need to give that back to you before you give anything to me. Freak! I love that book!
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Date: 2007-01-04 05:59 pm (UTC)The talk's actually on CD, so you could conceivably copy it and listen to it when you get a chance. Plus, I actually have been working on a "certain story" over the break (it's amazing what three weeks of no homework and traveling all over creation will do for ya ^_^)